MINUTES OF COMPANY OF NAVARONE GENERAL MEETING

 

MINUTES OF COMPANY OF NAVARONE AGM

 

PRESENT AT MEETING: PAUL,ARNOLD, EWAN, BAXTER, FOSTER,MCDOWALL,DUNKIRK, CLARA NATURE,CROSBY,

 

APOLOGIES:  SPEER, LAUGHTON,CLOONEY.

 

PAUL OPENED THE MEETING WITH A BATCH OF MRS KLAUSSMANS COOKIES. HE EXCLAIMED THAT MRS KLAUSSMAN WAS MUCH BETTER AFTER HER BOUT OF ILLNESS AND WOULD RETURN TO WORK SOON

EVERYONE AGREED THIS WAS EXCELLENT NEWS.

 

CHARLES LAUGHTON APOLOGISED FOR BEING ABSENT BUT INCLUDED THIS WITTY PHOTOGRAPH…..

EVERYONE CHUCKLED AT THIS.

 

GEORGE CLOONEY ALSO APOLOGISED FOR BEING ABSENT BUT INCLUDED THIS PHOTOGRAPH.

 

NOBODY THOUGHT THIS WAS FUNNY.  PAUL VOICED HIS INTENTION TO DISPEL CLOONEY FROM THE ORGANISATION. CROSBY THOUGHT IT SHOULD GO TO A VOTE SO THAT EVERYTHING WAS ABOVE BOARD. THE VOTE WAS UNANIMOUS AND CLOONEY WAS DISPELLED WITH IMMEDIATE EFFECT. FURTHERMORE CROSBY SUGGESTED USING THE MONEY FROM THE RAFFLE TO HIRE A CONTRACT KILLER TO ‘TEACH CLOONEY A LESSON HE WOULDN’T FORGET’ THIS WAS WIDELY FELT TO BE OVER THE TOP AND IN THE END IT WAS DECIDED THAT HE SHOULD JUST GET A GOOD THRASHING.

A UNANIMOUS VOTE WAS TAKEN.

 

DUNKIRK REPORTED THAT THE COFFEE MACHINE HAD BROKEN SEVERAL TIMES AND THAT IT HAD EMPTIED ITS INNARDS ONTO THE CARPET IN THE LOBBY SEVERAL TIMES.

PAUL RESOLVED TO HAVE THIS FIXED.

ALBERT CLAIMED HE QUITE LIKED THE SMELL OF COFFEE IN THE LOBBY AND BELIEVED IT SHOULD BE LEFT BROKEN AS THE SMELL WAS BRINGING BUSINESS IN FROM THE STREET. PAUL AGREED AND RESOLVED TO LEAVE THE MACHINE IN ITS BROKEN STATE AND INSTEAD TO ORDER A NEW COFFEE MACHINE THAT WORKED TO SIT ALONGSIDE THE BROKEN ONE.

EVERYONE CONCURRED THIS WAS THE BEST COURSE OF ACTION.

 

MOTHER NATURE STATED THAT SHE WAS NO LONGER GOING TO CONTINUE WITH AUTUMN THIS YEAR AND HAD DECIDED TO MOVE STRAIGHT ONTO WINTER. SHE WENT ON TO SAY SHE WOULD TRY AND WEDGE IN THE REST OF AUTUMN NEXT YEAR, POSSIBLY HALF WAY THROUGH SPRING OR JUST BEFORE SUMMER DEPENDING ON HER SCHEDULE.. CROSBY ASKED IF IT WOULD BE POSSIBLE TO HAVE A WHITE CHRISTMAS THIS YEAR AS HE WAS A BIT SHORT ON CASH AND HE WAS COUNTING ON RERELEASING HIS SONG. MOTHER NATURE SAID SHE WOULD SEE WHAT SHE COULD DO BUT THAT SHE  WASN’T REALLY RESPONSIBLE FOR GETTING CROSBYS CAREER BACK ON TRACK AND THAT IT WOULDN’T BE A BAD IDEA TO BRING OUT SOMETHING NEW RATHER THAN REHASHING THE SAME OLD CRAP. EVERYONE CONCURRED WITH THIS.BAXTER SUGGESTED THAT ALL THE KIDS WERE INTO SALSA THESE DAYS AND THAT MAY BE THE WAY TO GO. CROSBY ACKNOWLEDGED THIS. BAXTER WENT ON TO EXPLAIN SALSA IN SOME DETAIL AS HE HAD READ ABOUT IT ON WIKIPEDIA THE NIGHT BEFORE. AFTER 10 MINUTES FARNSWORTH NOTICED THAT THERE WERE NO COOKIES LEFT ON THE PLATE AND THAT HE HADNT HAD ANY. FOSTER ALSO SAID HE DIDN’T HAVE ANY. CHARLES SAID HE HAD ONE AND THAT IT WAS VERY GOOD.  BAXTER ASKED PAUL AS CHAIRMAN TO TAKE DISCIPLINERY ACTION AGAINST WHOEVER HAD HAD MORE THAN ONE COOKIE.

PAUL DECLINED TO DO THIS ON LACK OF EVIDENCE WHEREUPON  THE ROOM BROKE INTO SQUABBLES.

PAUL REGAINED CONTROL BY STATING THAT EVERYONE WAS PRESENT AS A GUEST OF HIS IMAGINATION AND THAT IF ANYONE SHOULD GET TWO COOKIES IT WAS HIM AND THAT IF ANYONE HAD A PROBLEM THEY COULD PISS OFF AND NOT BOTHER COMING BACK. WITH THIS SEVERAL MEMBERS VOTED TO BRANCH OFF FROM PAULS IMAGINATION AND FORM THEIR OWN SPLINTER GROUP CALLED THE REAL COMPANY OF NAVARONE. TO HAMMER HOME THE POINT ONE OF THE REBEL FACTION DEFECATED ON MRS KLAUSSMANS COOKIE PLATE.

 

PAUL SUGGESTED TO MCDOWALL THAT HE WAS AN ANIMAL AND TRIED TO RUB HIS FACE IN THE PLATE.

MCDOWALL SUGGESTED THAT PERHAPS IT WOULD BE BETTER IF PAUL TOOK HIS COMPANY AND STUCK IT WHERE THE SUN DOESN’T SHINE. PAUL SUGGESTED THAT PERHAPS THEY SHOULD LEAVE IT THERE FOR THE DAY AS THEY HAD ACCOMPLISHED A LOT. THE REST OF THE ROOM CONCURRED AND REMARKED ON HOW SPLENDID A MEETING IT HAD BEEN. BAXTER WONDERED WHAT THEY WOULD DO WITH MRS KLAUSSMANS COOKIE PLATE. THE DOER ELECTED TO RECLAIM THE DO. EVERYONE CONCURRED THAT THIS WAS THE BEST COURSE OF ACTION.

NEXT MEETING IS SCHEDULED FOR MONDAY.

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6 Responses to MINUTES OF COMPANY OF NAVARONE GENERAL MEETING

  1. Taht's Paul – Always making with the enjoyable posts!

  2. I've been missing the News o' Navaronne. Thanks for the update. =D

  3. navelgazer says:

    I do hope you wash mrs klaussman's plate before returning it to her.

  4. AmyH says:

    Wonderful notetaking. I see, however, that you are not following the rules of Parliamentary Procedures. You may want to think about that for future meetings in case someone calls a question on the legalities of the proceedings. It's always good to have your bases covered.

  5. ooh! i looked it up. lots of terms and procedures to learn. i shall bring it up at the next meeting. i'll feel just like jimmy stewart in 'mr smith goes to washington'
    no mr chairman! i shall not yield the floor!

  6. ah! no need! her eyesight is very poor and tis a brown plate anyhoo.

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